2021 The Rebirth of the Simsbury Bridge Club: Part 2

SBC 2.1. Continue reading

Wednesday evening, March 11, 2020, was the date of the last game of the Simsbury Bridge Club at Eno Hall before the shutdown necessitated by the Covid-19 pandemic. Fred Gagnon played with my wife Sue. He regaled us with the story of how the week before he had played an event in Colorado Springs1 that Colorado’s “patient zero” also attended. He said, quite correctly, that he was very lucky that he had not played against her or in any other way associated with her. In those very early days the treatment methodologies were mostly guesswork. Dozens of other bridge players were not as fortunate as Fred.

At the time my wife Sue and I were scheduled to start a riverboat cruise on the Danube River2 the next week. We had heard that a few people had already canceled, and we half-jokingly asked Fred if he wanted to sign up.

The club’s usual director, Ken Leopold, could not attend on March 11. Margie Garilli substituted for him. As a result I ended up with all of the club’s bridge equipment during the pandemic.

Unless you were lucky enough to be stuck in New Zealand, you probably did not give much thought to face-to-face bridge for the next year or so. A few clubs in Florida reopened rather quickly, but some of them had to close because of transmission of the virus.

The Hartford Bridge Club resumed play on June 15, 2021. Several people asked me when the SBC was going to reopen. I told them that it was up to Ken, who was the director and proprietor. This was his response:

I’d like to see how live playing goes at HBC for a while. When we restart (probably sometime in July), I’m going to ask people to sign up on Mondays to see if we have enough people for a game. I think people should be vaccinated to play.

July was a bad month for Ken, and so I was not too surprised to receive on August 3 this email from Sally Kirtley, who had been the director before Ken took over in Simsbury and who had directed regularly for the Hartford Bridge Club before and during the pandemic:

I got an email from Eno that they are accepting reservations starting in the fall.  I forwarded it to Ken, who responded that he is not going to be able to run it this fall.  I don’t know if that means that he won’t be playing at all either.  Just wondering if you think that it makes any sense for me to try to start it up again?  Do you think that we will get enough players?  Will you play if we start up again?

I replied that I definitely would play, but I thought that we should try to gauge how much interest people had in the game. I brought my mailing list (described in Part 1, which is posted here) up to date, and sent an email indicating that Sally and I were hoping to get the game going again in September. I asked people to respond if they thought that they would play, and I received over forty positive responses. Quite a few players indicated that they would play often.

The next email that I received from Sally on August 14 included the following:

I will see how quickly we can get into the space, and will definitely ask if we can require vaccinations – it being a public building, I don’t know.  As a private club, we certainly could, but I will make sure. 

As to masks, I think that we need to listen to the experts at the time.  I am personally okay with people not masking if they are vaccinated, but I do think that they are probably a good idea.

I am also planning a vacation in October and will be gone 10/13.

Jeanne Striefler.

Jeanne Striefler, a long-time member of the Simsbury Club reported to me that masks were definitely required in public buildings in Simsbury with or without vaccinations. Moreover, other groups that used public facilities had had problems with attempting to require vaccinations. I did not want to be involved in something that caused even one person to get Covid-19. I was therefore adamant that we require vaccinations.

The missive from Sally dated August 23 contained great news.

The town has reserved the room for us starting September 9.  As of right now, masks are required in town buildings.  We can require vaccinations. 

I wasn’t exactly sure how we could check for vaccinations, but I thought that we should agree on a schedule and publish it as soon as possible. We had pretty much decided on starting play on September 15 when I received this email from Sally on August 27:

Eno Hall says we can’t require vaccinations on town property.  I think that means a no-go for us – unless we just ignore them and request proof of vaccinations anyway?

So, I was forced to send out an email to everyone on my list that we would not start in September. Here was the text:

I wrote in the last email: “I am assuming that Eno Hall will allow us to verify that all players have been fully vaccinated. I, for one, will not play in a game that does not do this.”

Unfortunately, my assumption was wrong. The people who run Eno Hall will NOT permit us to check that all players have been vaccinated. Under those circumstances Sally and I are not willing to run the game. The current form of the disease is extremely contagious; one person could easily ruin it for many. We will review this decision in a few months. Perhaps things will have changed.

Med and Kathy Colket.

I received a lot of sympathetic responses to this. The one from Med Colket, who had played at Eno with his wife Kathy for several years, included an idea that caught my attention. I relayed it to Sally.

Med Colket had an intriguing suggestion. He recommended that we request that players submit proof of vaccination to me voluntarily. Then we only invite the people who have submitted valid proof. I would send out invitations every week, and people would RSVP. This will have the advantage of giving us a better estimate of table count.


A little later Jeanne learned that because we were a private entity we could require vaccinations if we wanted. The previous information that Sally received from Eno Hall had been erroneous. I decided to implement Med’s approach anyway. Our first game would be on October 20. I sent an email to everyone on my list:

We have used a suggestion from Med Colket to devise a way to reopen the Simsbury Bridge Club. We need a little time to get everything set up. Here is our schedule of games for the rest of the year:
October 20 and 27
November 3 and 10
December 8, 22, and 29. I am aware that some bridge players must cater to the wishes of burdensome family and friends during the holidays. However, I am optimistic about the last two dates because Christmas and New Years are on Saturdays this year.

Anyone can register as a vaccinated member of the SBC by sending an email or text to me, or leaving a message on my voice mail. You can register as either a player or a pair.
1) Designate the names of the player(s).
2) Provide proof of vaccination—either a photo of the card(s) or the date and time of a game played at the Hartford Bridge Club in 2021.
3) Pairs should designate whether they wish to be considered “recurring”.

On the Friday before every game I will send to all who have registered as vaccinated an email announcing the next week’s game. The deadline for responses will be the following Monday. People should notify me (by email, text, or voice mail) if:
1) They are a “recurring” pair that will not be playing the following Wednesday;
2) They are a registered pair that is not “recurring” but plans to play.
3) They want to provide proof of vaccination for a partner who was not previously registered.
4) They would like to play but lack a partner.

If fewer than twelve people (three tables) commit to play, the game will be canceled. I will send an email announcing the cancellation on the Tuesday before the game. I will also post a notice to that effect on the club’s website, which is at http://wavada.org/SimsburyBC/.

It was not overly difficult to implement this system. First I needed to add a field on the “audience” file for the SBC on the free version of MailChimp. I called the new field Registration. That part was easy, and I was familiar with how to do it. I then used a feature on MailChimp to designate two segments, one with a blank in this field and the other for players with a letter. I put an H in this field for those whom I had seen play at the Hartford Bridge Club and a C for people who had sent me copies of their vaccination cards.

The time-consuming part came next. I had to enter these by hand one at a time. I had to sort the file, find the player I wanted, select them for editing, scroll down to the field, enter the character, scroll to the bottom, and save it. The most annoying thing was that when I returned to the list of players, not only had my place on the list been lost. The records were also no longer sorted. So, I had to repeat the same process. After a while I had to add another step—skipping to the next page after sorting.

The good thing was that I could easily see a list of all the registered players and another list of the players who were on the master list but had not provided me with proof of vaccination. By the time of the first game seventy-two players were registered.


It has been well established that Ken and Lori Leopold had done a great job in 2019 of establishing a new standard for a small duplicate bridge club. One of the biggest attractions of the game—especially for those who often ate alone—was the wonderful spread of food and drink that Lori and some others helped prepare every week. Sally and I would have been happy if we could somehow have emulated them, but it was not really feasible for either of us, and the persistence of the Delta variant of the pandemic made it even a little dangerous.

Another thing that would be missing in this new version of the club—at least in the beginning—would be the lessons that I had presented. They had begun at 6PM or as close to that time as I could manage. Because I was still afraid of catching Covid-19, I intended to wear a mask, at least at first. I was fairly certain that one senior citizen struggling to speak through a mask to a group of senior citizens would not be very attractive. Also, the rest of the preparations would probably take up a good bit of my time, and I was quite busy with other projects, including these blog entries.

So, we would be relying on the wonderful game of face-to-face bridge to attract people to Eno Hall. We would also try to promote the same uniquely cheerful and supportive attitude among the players that the SBC previously boasted. We had strong hopes that those two elements would suffice.


Linda Starr.

As I mentioned, I had all the equipment, including the computer, at my house. Linda Starr, who had helped me in 2020 to use the Hartford Bridge Club’s Dealer4 machine to create the boards for SBC games, agreed to set up files for our first game and to give me a refresher course in how to create the boards. Actually, I had only the vaguest memory of how to use the the software that ran the dealing machine. She had to show me everything again. I took careful notes and promised not to lose them this time.

I was able to create a set of boards and to photocopy the hand records. I remembered how to load the dealing machine with cards, but I warned Linda that the fine coordination in my fingers was terrible. I then proved my point. When I withdrew the very first hand from the very first board three or four cards slipped out of my hand and came to res behind the shelves on which the Dealer4 was positioned.

Left to right: printer; display, keyboard, mouse, & computer; Dealer4 on shelf.

This had happened to me at least once back in 2020. I just removed a box of who knows what from the bottom shelf and told Linda “At least I also have long arms and fingers.” I then skillfully retrieved all the missing cards. I counted them to make certain.

From that point on I created the boards and printed the hand records with almost no difficulty. I did not interpret this unexpected feat3 as an ill omen, but I probably should have.

Linda also created PBN files (needed to submit results) for all the rest of the games scheduled for 2021. She copied them to a USB drive that I had brought with me, and she showed me how to find them on the computer that ran the dealing machine. I should be all set for all of 2021.

By this time I had commitments from ten pairs. We were all set to have a real face-to-face bridge game!

On Tuesday, October 9—the day before the game—I received this depressing email from Sally:

We have a problem!  Eno Hall is telling me that they can’t accommodate us tomorrow.  We can start back next week.  I’m sure we could use HBC for one week if you want to tell people to meet there one time?  Or just tell them that we will start next week?

So, I had to send out an email announcing the cancellation of the first week. It frustrated and humiliated me to have to do it.

We later found out that the reason that they could not accommodate us was because they had not scheduled a janitor for that evening. That was what I had speculated was the source of the problem, but most people thought it must be something less mundane.


Donna Feir.

We had an even better turnout for the rescheduled first week—eleven pairs with a remarkably diverse level of experience. I came in early to the Hartford Bridge Club on Wednesday morning before the game. I planned to use the boards made for 10/20. I could see no reason not to use them. The only problem was that Linda had not copied that one file on the USB drive. So, I asked Donna Feir, the club manager and the director for that morning’s game, if I could copy that one file. My other alternative was to make new boards from the file for 10/27 that was already on the computer. That would take me about a half hour even if all went well, and then I would need another ten minutes or so to print the hand records.

I let Donna talk me into a third alternative—using the boards and the hand records created for the previous night’s game at the HBC. They were available because too few players had signed up. So, all that I had to do was to copy the PBN file from the computer used by the directors. I located the file without difficulty, put my USB drive in the port, and copied. I then put all of the gear in my car. Now I was ready.


My house to Sue’s.

I had arranged to take Sue Rudd and Maria Van Der Ree In my Honda to Wednesday evening’s game. I was supposed to pick Sue up at 5:30. The Honda and I arrived in Sue’s driveway fashionably late at 5:32. I honked my horn and waited a few minutes. Her house appeared dark. I honked the horn again. Then I took out my cell phone and dialed her number. It rang five or six times. Then a bizarre masculine voice identified itself as the “backup voice mail” for Sue Rudd. It then advised me not to leave a message because Sue does not usually check it!

Sue’s to Maria’s.

So, I called Maria’s number to see if she knew what was going on. It rang five or six times and then went to voice mail. I left a message and could think of nothing better to do than to drive to Maria’s home. I found her outside waiting for me. I tried to tell her that she couldn’t play because I could not rouse Sue, but she got in the car anyway.

At that point, I called Sue Rudd again. Three phone calls in one day was a personal record for me; the previous record was one. Sue answered this time. She was upset at me for not picking her up on time. I told her that I had been in her driveway at 5:32, and I would be there again in ten minutes. I was. Sue got in my Honda, and we took off.

I was not stopped by any policemen on the way to Simsbury, but it wasn’t for lack of trying. I pulled into Eno’s parking lot at 6:45, fifteen minutes late. Jerry Hirsch was standing there waiting to help me with the gear.

Jerry Hirsch.

Everyone was playing by 6:50. The game itself went fairly smoothly. We were done by our mandated finishing time of 10 o’clock. Everyone seemed to have had a good time. “And the evening and the morning were the first day.”

The crowded room that greeted me when I finally entered the playing area made everything worthwhile. The two people whom I had never met—David Marks and Ann Sagalyn—introduced themselves to me while Sally, Jerry, and a few others set up the six-table Howell.

When, after the scores had been announced, I tried to transfer the PBN file from the USB drive onto the SBC computer, I discovered that I had copied the wrong file at the HBC. So, I had to promise Sally that, when I obtained a copy of the right file, I would send it to her by email.

I then copied the file containing the text version of the results so that I could insert it into the email to the registered members scheduled for Friday.

I brought all of the gear home except the very heavy laptop and its power supply. Sally took those with her so that she could send the results to the ACBL.

Don’t go this way.

I have driven from Simsbury to Enfield hundreds of times. I may have even bragged that I could do it blindfolded. On this evening, however, I was very tired. The adrenaline high had worn off. As I exited the parking lot, I turned the wrong way onto Station Street, which is one-way. This totally disrupted my perspective. I took Iron Horse Blvd. up to Route 10 without any difficulty, but then I missed my turn onto Wolcott Road. I could have salvaged a little dignity by turning onto Floydville Road, but I did not see a sign for it. Instead I drove all the way up to Route 20 in Granby. This little detour added perhaps ten miles to the trip.

I did not realize until the next morning that I had never eaten supper the previous evening.

I was still exhausted on Thursday, but I took the time to write up a Hand of the Week. It took me much longer than before because I had never precisely documented the php programs that I had written in 2019 to produce it. I eventually figured out how they worked, keyed in the hand and my ideas, and sent out an email to invite everyone to the game on November 3. This email included a copy of the summary of the results from the 10/27 game.

The file that I needed was stored on the HBC director’s computer, which is barely visible through the left armrest.

I obtained a copy of the correct PBN file and emailed it to Sally. However, I never received the email from the ACBL with a link to the Live for Clubs web page for the game. It turned out that Sally had never used the procedure for submitting results established in 2020 for submitting the results in the format required for the Live for Clubs software. She promised to figure it out.


The preparation for the second game went smoothly. The trip from Enfield to Simsbury was blissfully uneventful. Both Sue and Maria were ready on time. We arrived at Eno at 6:15, and we were ready to play by 6:25.

Unfortunately, Route 44 was closed because of an accident somewhere on or near Avon Mountain. The alternate routes were jammed with traffic. Two people from West Hartford—Felix Springer and Kathie Ferguson—arrived late.

When Felix arrived at about 6:45 we started the game. Al Gee and Kathie were assigned a sitout for the first round.

It was a near thing, but we got all twenty-four boards completed and scored so that we could leave by 10 o’clock. Some people had apparently doffed their masks at some point, and someone noticed them. Sally received an email on Thursday from Karen Haberlin at Eno Hall:

Hi Sally,

This is just a reminder that masks are still required in town buildings unless people are eating or drinking.

Thank you,

Karen

Meanwhile, Sally must have figured out how to attach the files; I received the emails for both games. I thought that something was still amiss. I noticed that the links to download the hand record files were missing from both the selection page and the results pages. I later determined that they were also missing on the HBC results. The software must have been changed during the pandemic.

I adjusted the emails in which I invite players to the next game so that the instructions for taking advantage of the feature for printing a hand record was removed.


1. On May 1, 2020 the New York Times ran a long article about this event and the popularity of bridge in general. It is posted here.

2. Our experiences regarding the First-Ever Regional at Sea on a Riverboat is described here.

3. The trickiest part of using the dealing machine is withdrawing the completed board from the machine. Cards sometimes get stuck. If you pull the board out a little and then push it back to adjust the cards, Dealer4 might start dealing the next deck. Then you have a mess to deal with.

2021 April 19-24: Geeks on Parade

A week to fix a printing problem? Continue reading

This is the usual setup of my desk. The printer (top) is only a couple of feet from the CPU. The display is balanced on my Italian dictionary. My (always plugged in) phone and wallet are stored on the base of the display.

My HP color LaserJet model M252dw, which had been attached to my Lenovo desktop and functioning without difficulty for at least five years, was still performing admirably on Friday, April 16. I did not use it on Saturday or Sunday because I was playing bridge in the online qualification tournament for the Grand National Teams (GNT).

On Monday, April 19, I decided to print my first ever coupon for cat litter. I redeemed 325 of my Paw Points on freshstep.com for a $3 coupon. The company emailed me a link to a web page on which I could print my coupon. I clicked on the link and then clicked on the “Print” button on the webpage. The screen said “Preparing preview”, but it never got any further. It just sat there spinning. I closed all the tabs on my Foxfire browser.

I clicked on the link in the email again. Foxfire started, and the same screen with the “Print” button appeared. The familiar “Preparing preview” appeared, but noting ever printed. There were no files in the printer queue.

After that, the webpage linked from the email would not allow me to try to print the coupon. I found the contact email address on freshstep.com and sent an email that explained the problem and asked them what to do to obtain my coupon.


On Tuesday the troubleshooter reported a problem with the printer.

I did not need to print anything else until late on Tuesday. At that point I could not even make a spooled file from any program. The system reported no errors. I ran the troubleshooter in Windows. It reported a problem with the LaserJet printer, but it found no specific issues.

I tried various combinations of shutting down the printer and restarting Windows. Nothing worked. When I tried to print a test page, an error appeared on the computer, and nothing printed.

A few years previous to this a virus had somehow infected my computer. A Geek Squad member (I don’t think that they called them Agents yet) found it quickly by taking over my computer and eradicated it. I was impressed enough that I had no hesitation about contacting the Geek Squad in the morning.


To Chat with a Geek Squad Agent one must click on the blue circle at the bottom right of the webpage with the word “Help” in it.

On Wednesday Morning I pointed my browser to the Geek Squad website and started a “Chat” session. In the comments window I described the problem in quite a bit of detail. Evidently the “Agent” who commenced the Chat did not have access to this. I described everything again. I was assured that this could be fixed if I allowed another agent to sign on to the computer remotely. I agreed.

On this window you must click on “Chat now”.

I was then asked if we had a Geek Squad account. I said that we once did, but I did not know if it was still active. The Agent looked it up based on the phone number that I had provided. The Agent found nothing. I asked if I could get a contract for one issue. The answer was “Yes, for $39.99.” I approved the terms by clicking on a link. Another chat window appeared on my display.

Click on “Live Chat” here.

Less than a minute later Agent Xavier introduced himself in this chat window. He asked me to unplug the printer cable and plug it into a different USB port.

I thought that this might work. In fact, I was kicking myself for not trying it earlier. Alas, it did not help. Turning the printer off and on did not help either.

Agent Xavier then asked me if we had another printer cable. Like Noah’s family, we have at least two of almost everything somewhere in our house, but I would not even know where to begin looking for a printer cable. If I found one, it would probably be thirty years old and have the wrong interfaces.

Adhering to one of my favorite axioms, “If you can’t find it, you ain’t got it”, I replied that I did not think so.

Undaunted, Agent Xavier explored the nooks and crannies of my computer’s insides for quite a long time. He told me that the problem was probably due to the fact that back in October of 2020 the last update of Windows 10 had not completed successfully. Frankly, this sounded like an admission that his only remaining tool was a hammer and he had just found a nail. I mean, how could that be the source of the problem when I had printed hundreds of pages in the interim?

I did a lot of nothing while this went on.

On the other hand, I am no expert on Windows 10. Maybe Agent Xavier was. So, I did not protest when he decided to try the update again. It took several hours, but when it finally finished, it appeared successful. At least, no error messages appeared. Back in October I was pretty sure that Windows had reported that it had been unable to complete the update.

The very first screen that appeared when the update finally finished was different. There was still a breathtaking photo in the background that had been fuzzed out, and my name appeared, but there was no field for the password. Instead, there was a clickable phrase “Sign in”. When I clicked on it, a window with a password field appeared. I entered it. I then had to go through a series of screens rejecting offers from Microsoft. So far, so good.

I tried without success to print from a number of programs. The error in printing a test page was no longer there, but every attempt at printing produced a spooled file in error status.

Agent Xavier’s little chat box did not reappear when I signed onto the system after the update. Knowing that I would need to go through the entire process of contacting the Geek Squad through the Chat windows again, I opted to wait until the next morning when I would be more rested and alert.


On Thursday morning I contacted the Geek Squad website and started another Chat session. I went through the same tedious process because neither Agent on the previous day had told me what my case number was. This Chat Agent found it told me that the case number was CAS5881919-X8R5M3. I wrote it down. The Chat Agent sent me a link so that he/she could sign on, but it timed out before anyone took advantage of the connection.

So, I had to contact the Geek Squad chat again. This time a different Agent sent me another link and set things up so that Agent D S (Double-0 Soul?)1 assumed control of my system from his little window. After trying several things he determined that the problem was the cable. He downloaded the wizard app from HP, which took some time to install. He then offered to walk me through setting up the printer for Wi-fi. I agreed. 

I set the keyboard was on the top of the printer, and I pivoted the display almost 180 degrees.

I needed to rearrange my computer’s peripherals so that I could see the printer and display at the same time and still be able to able to type on the keyboard. This was not easy. A snake’s nest of cables has formed over the years on the floor between my computer and my printer. Furthermore, I had to stand up through all of this; there was no room for a chair.

I never figured out why the printer was not able to locate our network (ChaChawave) when I did this for Agent D S.

I located the correct menus on the printer’s little screen and pressed the option to retrieve Wi-fi network information. It ran for a few minutes. Agent D S told me to watch it while he did some things. Meanwhile, the printer kept trying to retrieve network information. To this day I do not understand why it could not find any networks.

Evidently Agent D S decided to restart Windows for some reason. I did not pay close attention to what he/she was doing. I know for certain that I did not do it.

When the system came back up, the same first screen appeared as had on Wednesday after the successful update of Windows 10. I clicked on the “Sign in” link below my name. An unexpected window appeared. It said that I needed an “app” and asked if I wanted to search the store. There were two buttons: “Yes” and “No”. Unfortunately, both options returned me to the screen with the “Sign in” button. I was stuck. Restarting did not help. Neither did turning the computer off and then back on.

When my computer restarted, as usual, a Lenovo screen appeared. The lower left corner said “To interrupt normal startup press Enter“. I did so. Many times. I tried holding down the Enter key. I was not able to interrupt the process; the screen with the “Sign in” button appeared again, followed by the same window demanding an app.

Once again I was tired and very frustrated. I decided to employ the tactic that had worked so well for Quintus Fabius Maximus Verrucosus against Hannibal in the Second Punic War. I retreated and delayed.


On Friday morning I contacted the Geek Squad Chat again. I explained what happened. The Char Agent said that if I could not sign on I must bring the computer to Best Buy. Evidently it was impossible to find out what Agent D S had done, or perhaps the Chat Agent was too lazy to find out.

I definitely did not want to bring the CPU in to Best Buy. The local store in Enfield was recently closed, presumably a casualty of the pandemic. The closest remaining ones were ugly drives to Manchester, CT, or Holyoke, MA.

Evidently Geek Squad Agents are really issued badges, but I don’t think that they have a license to kill.

I called the Geek Squad 800 number to get a second opinion. Of course, I had to wait in the queue until the next available Agent could take my call. The Agent who finally answered the phone was sympathetic, but she also insisted that my only option was to cart the machine to Best Buy. I pleaded that I was 72 years old, it was more than a thirty-minute drive, and I did not want to go into a “big box” store in the middle of a pandemic. I protested that there must be someone who understood what my computer’s strange behavior was symptomatic of. More sympathy, but no action.

This look means, “Pick me up. I want to sit on your lap while you play on the computer.”

An appointment was required to interact in person with a human being wearing a Geek Squad shirt. The telephone Agent offered to make one2 for me. There was one open slot at 2:20. It was already 1:45. After that nothing was available until Tuesday! I reluctantly took the 2:20 slot and rushed to remove all of the cables from the back of my computer. While I was in the process of doing so, my seventeen-year-old cat Giacomo entered the office and started howling, a very reliable sign that he was about to barf. I grabbed some outdated grocery store inserts and put them in front of him, and (mirabile dictu!) he mostly hit them. I cleaned up the mess and drove to Best Buy with my computer and AC cable.

The GS guys at BB in Manchester wore black shirts like Kelvin’s.

I arrived at the store at about 2:30. The Geek Squad guy there was waiting for me. He spent the ten remaining minutes of my appointment trying to find my open problem on his computer. He finally did, and he also told me that he had found my account. It was under 860-386-0701, the support line for TSI. That phone was disconnected in 2014 when we closed down the office in East Windsor.

The Geek Squad employee then attached his display and keyboard and verified the problem. Then he disappeared into the back to talk to “my tech”.

The diagnosis was that my operating system had been corrupted. They would need to reinstall Windows 10. He said that they could save my files, but I would need to reinstall the programs. I had been through this once before when my hard drive crashed. Getting back to something close to where I had been was a monumental undertaking. I knew very well that this would be a major hassle. In despair I crossed my arms on the counter in front of me and set my forehead on them.

The designated talking Geek disappeared to converse with his “tech” again. I imagined that in the back room the Great and Powerful Oz was issuing edicts punctuated with bursts of fire.

The talker returned and asked me if restore points had been set. I said that I thought that I saw Agent D S do this, but I wasn’t sure. He said that if there was a restore point, they would not need to reinstall Windows.

Hope springs eternal! I left the box there and drove home with my claim check. I missed one turn recommended by the Google Maps lady, but she put me back on course and eventually welcomed me home. As I entered the house I informed Sue that I no longer had a computer, but I did have a piece of paper.

I received a text at 5:38 that said that the computer was being repaired. At 5:39 another text assured me that the repair was complete. The text did not say whether they had to reinstall Windows. I thought it very likely that the answer must be “No” because not even the Great Oz could install Windows 10 that fast.

I could pick up my computer! The text gave a link to make an appointment. Sure enough, the first one available was on Tuesday afternoon.

Sue thought that I should drive out to Best Buy to pick up the machine immediately. I was not sure that they would even allow me into the store without an appointment. She called Best Buy’s 800 number3. The guy on the phone made an appointment for 12:50PM on Saturday.


I left for Best Buy at a little after noon on Saturday. I arrived about 12:45. A different talking Geek retrieved my PC. He said that they did not need to install Windows. Rather, my computer had been booting in “Safe Mode”. The person who worked on it changed it so that it no longer did this, and a password was no longer required. I have no idea how this was accomplished, but the Great Oz would not talk to lesser beings either, unless, of course, they had murdered a witch.

The computer was turned over to me with no AC cable. The talking Geek could not find it, but he graciously gave me a new one. Best Buy charged me neither for the cable nor the “repair”.

I badly wanted to go home and try the PC, but the original problem had not yet been addressed. The printer still did not work. I had brought the printer cable, which was about fifteen feet long, with me to Best Buy. I asked an employee where the printer cables were. He told me, but I could not find them.

I looked everywhere in the vicinity. While I was doing so, my right foot began to hurt rather badly as it often did when I had walked a mile or so. I needed to do my standing step-over stretch. It took ninety seconds, but it relieves the pain. I had to hope that no one saw me.

Eventually a salesman helped me to find a printer cable. They only had 6′ ones, but that was adequate. I bought one and drove home.

The Invoice from the Geek Squad was carefully itemized. $0.00 appears ten times.

The PC worked fine. The printer seemed to work the first time that I tried with the new cable, but after that I could not get it to function. I decided to try to configure a Wi-fi printer on my own. For some reason the printer had no difficulty finding the network this time. I found the password (which the printer called “passphrase”) and carefully keyed it in on the tiny screen on the top of the printer. My seventy-two-year-old hands were not very steady, but I did manage to get it to work.

The first and fifth printers on this list produce output on the LaserJet printer. The duplicate on line 2 produces an error.

From this point on, whenever I printed anything I saw the LaserJet printer three times in the list of available printers. I thought that maybe it was connected both ways. However, if I chose the second one, an error appeared: “Could not start printer. Please check your printer configuration.”

It did not matter if the cable from the printer was plugged in or not. So, I deduced that I had two choices, both of which used Wi-fi to request output.


So, as I write this on May 5, 2021, two questions remain unresolved:

  1. Why did the printer suddenly stopped working when it was connected to the CPU by a cable? I can think of two possible explanations.
    1. A freakish solar event penetrated the chip in the printer and caused a bit to flip in the software that handled direct connections. If you do not think that this is possible, listen to this Radiolab podcast. Please don’t tell any Republicans about this.
    2. Somehow the connection in the cable interface itself or inside the printer became loose or damaged.
  2. What about the coupon that started this whole circus?

Since a workaround was found and successfully, and there is no easy way to investigate the remaining printing issue, I have lost interest.

Fresh Step has not responded to my last two emails. I will doggedly pursue this and update this entry when it has been resolved. $3 is at stake!


1. “Agent Double-O-Soul” was a modest hit for Edwin Starr in 1965. His best song was definitely “War”.

2. An appointment, not a shirt.

3. The store was not answering the phone because of the pandemic.